The Demise of a Potential Date
I think it is good to have a list of deal breakers, and it’s also important to update them. After each person you date or meet there is a potential to find another thing that you are just not willing to deal with, thus called a “deal breaker”. Everyone has them and maybe not always sticks to them. However, it’s important that you do. Deal breakers are very important to pay attention to. Don’t lower your standards for anyone.
Now, I am sure some of you are dying to know what my deal breakers are since we are on the subject. Okay okay…. So here they are:
1. Smoking– This shows me (in my head) that you do not care about your health, thus, how you could care about mine. I am very health conscious and I need my mate to be the same. Plus, I do not like the smell of cigarette smoke.
2. Humor – If you are not funny in the least bit the relationship you will start to bore me. I have tried to date someone before that thought he was funny but his jokes were not funny whatsoever. I need someone that I can play off of and I love to laugh. If you have a dry sense of humor you are not the one for me. Plus, I don’t want to hurt your feelings in the case you tell a joke and it’s not funny because trust me I won’t laugh.
3. Money – You don’t have to be rich, but no longer will I date someone broke again. It limits what we can do together, and that means no fun for us. Also, I am not going to be in a position to help your behind out when you decide not to have your ish together. No more! You don’t have to pay my bills, I am not that type of girl but I do
like an occasional adventure.
4. Chivary – This is a huge one for me. I like to feel like a princess. I like for you to hold my bags especially if it appears I need some help and I am struggling. I like for a guy to open doors for me. Things like that will win big points with me. It feels
nice and brings me to believe I am special to you.
5. Narcissism – Never ever again will I deal with someone with this kind of personality disorder. I will not tolerate my mate loving himself (especially appearance wise) more than me. It's great to love yourself but not great when it seems to have become an obsession for you. It’s also not good when you decide you are hotter than me and treat me accordingly. And I will not be in competition with you period. Please
do not confuse this with high confidence, which brings me to my next one.
6. Confidence – I love a guy that is confident about his intelligence and who he is as a person. I also like a guy that feels attractive as long as he does not go overboard with it. *See #5* (which brings me to my next one again)
7. Fitness– I love it when my guy takes the initiative to go to the gym, however; I am not looking for a “look at my muscles” gym rat either. That annoys the crap out of me. The next thing these kind of guys always ends up saying to me is “How do I look?”, while standing in front of me half naked or completely naked. Girls say that kind of
stuff when they put on a sexy dress for you. Ask me how you look when we are going out somewhere and you want to make sure you dressed for the occasion.
8. Appearance – Now that we are talking about narcissism, confidence, and fitness. My man has to be sexy and good looking. The two are different. Sexy is a man to me that has this air about him---his walk, his demeanor, how he talks etc. Some people called that having “swagger”. Good looking is if he is clean cut, dresses nice, and
just plain handsome. He doesn’t have to be a superstar type, actually I am a little weary of those but I haven’t had children and I would like them to be cute. I also have issues with doing the dirty with a guy I feel is not attractive. I just can’t do it. May sound shallow but oh well. I think being attracted to your mate is very important because when the tingling feelings go away then what do you have to go on to get your sexual juices flowing to even kiss the person? No kissies means no relationship--- basically you are just a good friend.
9. Consideration– I have dated a couple that I noticed had no consideration for people. I am watching you and if I see that you are inconsiderate and rude to others I can almost bet at some point you will be rude to me. It never fails. I always do my best (110%) to be considerate with others so I will not tolerate anything less from my
partner.
10. Stability – I have found in past relationships how important this is. I always had this we can come up together type of mentality with men. But a man needs to be a man and that means he must be stable and able (to take care of home). I will not even attempt to help a man come up anymore. I know the expression there’s always a good woman behind the man, but not sure if that entails her helping him do what he needs to be doing anymore.
Okay so those are my Top 10 deal breakers (trust I have more). Perhaps I could add more and may do that in a vblog but I didn’t want this to get too long and I am so eager to read about your deal breakers. So please comment and share! I am nosy. *wink*
I think it is good to have a list of deal breakers, and it’s also important to update them. After each person you date or meet there is a potential to find another thing that you are just not willing to deal with, thus called a “deal breaker”. Everyone has them and maybe not always sticks to them. However, it’s important that you do. Deal breakers are very important to pay attention to. Don’t lower your standards for anyone.
Now, I am sure some of you are dying to know what my deal breakers are since we are on the subject. Okay okay…. So here they are:
1. Smoking– This shows me (in my head) that you do not care about your health, thus, how you could care about mine. I am very health conscious and I need my mate to be the same. Plus, I do not like the smell of cigarette smoke.
2. Humor – If you are not funny in the least bit the relationship you will start to bore me. I have tried to date someone before that thought he was funny but his jokes were not funny whatsoever. I need someone that I can play off of and I love to laugh. If you have a dry sense of humor you are not the one for me. Plus, I don’t want to hurt your feelings in the case you tell a joke and it’s not funny because trust me I won’t laugh.
3. Money – You don’t have to be rich, but no longer will I date someone broke again. It limits what we can do together, and that means no fun for us. Also, I am not going to be in a position to help your behind out when you decide not to have your ish together. No more! You don’t have to pay my bills, I am not that type of girl but I do
like an occasional adventure.
4. Chivary – This is a huge one for me. I like to feel like a princess. I like for you to hold my bags especially if it appears I need some help and I am struggling. I like for a guy to open doors for me. Things like that will win big points with me. It feels
nice and brings me to believe I am special to you.
5. Narcissism – Never ever again will I deal with someone with this kind of personality disorder. I will not tolerate my mate loving himself (especially appearance wise) more than me. It's great to love yourself but not great when it seems to have become an obsession for you. It’s also not good when you decide you are hotter than me and treat me accordingly. And I will not be in competition with you period. Please
do not confuse this with high confidence, which brings me to my next one.
6. Confidence – I love a guy that is confident about his intelligence and who he is as a person. I also like a guy that feels attractive as long as he does not go overboard with it. *See #5* (which brings me to my next one again)
7. Fitness– I love it when my guy takes the initiative to go to the gym, however; I am not looking for a “look at my muscles” gym rat either. That annoys the crap out of me. The next thing these kind of guys always ends up saying to me is “How do I look?”, while standing in front of me half naked or completely naked. Girls say that kind of
stuff when they put on a sexy dress for you. Ask me how you look when we are going out somewhere and you want to make sure you dressed for the occasion.
8. Appearance – Now that we are talking about narcissism, confidence, and fitness. My man has to be sexy and good looking. The two are different. Sexy is a man to me that has this air about him---his walk, his demeanor, how he talks etc. Some people called that having “swagger”. Good looking is if he is clean cut, dresses nice, and
just plain handsome. He doesn’t have to be a superstar type, actually I am a little weary of those but I haven’t had children and I would like them to be cute. I also have issues with doing the dirty with a guy I feel is not attractive. I just can’t do it. May sound shallow but oh well. I think being attracted to your mate is very important because when the tingling feelings go away then what do you have to go on to get your sexual juices flowing to even kiss the person? No kissies means no relationship--- basically you are just a good friend.
9. Consideration– I have dated a couple that I noticed had no consideration for people. I am watching you and if I see that you are inconsiderate and rude to others I can almost bet at some point you will be rude to me. It never fails. I always do my best (110%) to be considerate with others so I will not tolerate anything less from my
partner.
10. Stability – I have found in past relationships how important this is. I always had this we can come up together type of mentality with men. But a man needs to be a man and that means he must be stable and able (to take care of home). I will not even attempt to help a man come up anymore. I know the expression there’s always a good woman behind the man, but not sure if that entails her helping him do what he needs to be doing anymore.
Okay so those are my Top 10 deal breakers (trust I have more). Perhaps I could add more and may do that in a vblog but I didn’t want this to get too long and I am so eager to read about your deal breakers. So please comment and share! I am nosy. *wink*
Thanks Rome and Crystal for the inspiration to post this!
Marika
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